One of things I don’t understand is when mums are mean to each other or judge people

And one of the worst things about the internet is that it seems to be a breeding ground for this and it really bothers me.

It is like everyone feels in competition with each other and wants to take a swipe at each other and it can really cause a lot of upset and hurt in a lot of people unnecessarily

People seem to like to prove they are better or know more or have better behaved kids, or kids that sleep through the night or the way they exercise is right, or their clothes are better, or that they breastfed for longer and so on and on….


And to me it feels like this competitive nature breeds the “I KNOW BEST” mentality and then this ends up in a school yard mentality where things can get unpleasant quickly – and I am sure we have all seen that a lot on Facebook pages in particular

And it has always bothered me which is why I do SO MUCH to ensure that across our Healthy Mummy private social network groups  we do all we can to support mums and ensure there is no judgement or mean behaviour – and if there is – then than person is removed from the groups so that it doesn’t ruin the vibe for anyone else – and I am so passionate about this!

But it is hard online as there is controversy GALORE everywhere you look. Brands or media outlets seem to court controversy as more people talking about something (even in a bad way) means more people on their sites which means more money they can charge for advertising

Or some celebs create controversy do it to get more inch columns and they need to be in the news to drive sales for whatever they make money from and I must say I try and avoid all those kinds of sites/stories/people as OMG it is exhausting, creates such a negative vibe and is a total time thief – and it is depressing that it happens so much and that the media love to report on it

No judgement

The way I look at it is;

  • We are all mums trying to do our best and no one is perfect
  • We all have our own way of doing things – and it doesn’t mean that one way is better than the other – it just means it is different and if it works for you then go for it
  • We all have different issues to deal with and we all deal with situations differently
  • We don’t need to compare ourselves to others. Live your life for you and do what you feel is right – and if you feel judged and forced to change who you are by a friend/family member or a Facebook group then distance yourself from them
  • Just because you think something – it doesn’t mean it is right
  • We should all try and look at things from each other’s perspective and then we can be more understanding and forgiving
  • The written word is SO easy to misinterpret – there is no tone and it is easy to have things taken the wrong way
And yes we all get tired and grumpy and think things but that doesn’t mean we should say it or write it as then we run the risk of making another mum feel terrible and things can get out of hand pretty quickly.

I am a strong believer in not forcing opinions on people as we are all different and I also think there is so much unpleasantness in the world that we don’t need to create more of it by creating controversy and ill feeling with people online or offline

Let’s all support each other, accept we are different, accept that we are not always right and embrace the fact that we are all just trying to the best in life as mothers, friends, wives, girlfriends, sisters, cousins, workers, cooks, cleaners – and the list goes on!

Rhian x

P.S – you can join our Healthy Mummy private social network group here

Follow me on instagram at @rhianbusyallen